Vipassana

To see things as they really are.

Observation.

A 10 day silent meditation course stemming from Gotama Buddha, over 2,500 years ago. Which, simply stated, is concentrating on the body, its sensations and the insight that this provides.

As a serious meditator for the past 10 years, having first practiced when I was 11 years old.  I could feel my discipline in practicing had been slacking for about two years. I signed up for Viapssana, knowing that 10 days with 10 hours a day of meditation would switch my discipline button back on.

I have done over a decade of inner growth and well being work, varying practices as a way to gain inner insight. Whether it be meditations, leadership and communication courses, detox regimes, Kundalini and Hatha Yoga,  Native American healing work, energy and sound therapy, Guru work……. I could go on….. 😉

Yet this was different than most anything I have undertaken.

It was putting effort into observation. Focus on respiration. Mindful of the sensations of the body, without allowing aversion or craving to take over, to allow old mind patterns that cause suffering and misery to become eradicated.

It sounds simple, sitting for hours, almost like a reTREAT.

Not quite. It was extremely hard work, training new parts of the mind to  work in a different way than what one is inherently programmed with.

 

The first four days were cold, stormy and rainy, trudging across the soggy grounds it felt miserable, synonymous with how my mind felt.  I couldn’t fathom how we could get through the rest of the course. It felt like one day was a week and my body felt uncomfortable sitting for so long. What gave me solace was the food. Vegetarian, delicious rice and curries and veggie dishes, soups and salads, prepared fresh every day.

At times I felt like

img_4588

Other time I felt a quality of beautiful inner

 

peace

Focus. Equanimity. Awareness. These were key words for the process, one that became intensely beautiful, with profound self-realizations. The technique is a practice which creates a foundation for self transformation and awareness.

The facilites we stayed at were simple, clean and nice. The break from the phone and internet to tune into the natural world was a relief, one that was much needed for my mind without any tech distractions.

The last 5 days of the course seemed to become lighter. The sun finally came out and at night the stars were vivid on the magical lands close to Yosemite. The 8th and 9th day something profound was happening, it felt as though my senses were super heightened and everything took on a technicolor hue, like a 5 dimensional quality. The silence became solace and I felt an unburdening of my layers of consciousness, which created a lighter, buoyant sense.

Vipassana is a practice, of mindfulness and awareness every moment. To be present, now. Relinquishing normal reactions to self or situations and taking a step back to allow observation to keep the mind in a place of equanimity. With discipline I feel this technique has the potential to enhance life immensely, I can sense a transformation from the 10 days.

My intentions when I left were to live a life of more joy, inner peace while radiating compassionate love.

 

xo,

Nicole

The Fall of the Feminine

Once upon a time the God and Goddess stood together, hand in hand in love with one another and their creation in a balanced harmony.

Over time the Goddess has fallen, to her knees, weeping as she witnessed her lands and creatures wreaked by destruction. Perpetrated by bloodshed, with wars waged against her children. As she fell, she felt the pain sink deep into her heart and core, embedding itself into the genetic memory of all humans.

This became the fall of humanity’s hearts and intuitive minds. For as the feminine fell, we were thrust into harsh times. This harshness has encapsulated our race in a time capsule that censors our quest for sustenance that can be re-attuned to by going deep within.

Many hear the resonant chords in our hearts and minds of a time when the balance with the feminine was harmonious. When this suppressed information was understood, engaged with.

That which is suppressed must also be extremely powerful.

This post is not to place blame, nor focus on what has happened. It’s to uncover a deeply rooted story that has been hidden; the power of the feminine and loss of sacred knowledge and the connection to our natural cycles and rhythms. This includes the earth, all earthlings and ways of being in harmony with her and through her, the universe at large.

This is my Philosopher’s Stone if you will and a taboo subject, as the information is quite hidden, some of it destroyed. The remembering of where we come from is vitally important to me in the quest for wisdom, attainment of higher consciousness and what it represents.

Let’s just take the story I’m about to present as an allegory, or a metaphor. One that can be interpreted in many ways, yet has a similar by-product seen by the denial of our intrinsically connected nature. This fall I speak of has been one of the most suppressed pieces of information in our history. I’ve been researching different parts of it for several years. If you are interested you can do your own research as I try to keep this simple because one can definitely get sucked into a rabbit hole of it. With this plunge it’s like we’ve been cut off, like an etheric umbilical cord, from our primordial source of nature and being. Our race as a whole.

What I refer to as the patriarchial rule is not men or males, it’s the dogma, control, sublimation, domination and suppression of humans and nature through religions and corruption. The subtle and not so subtle dishonoring and shutting down the “human being” more so the feminine. This is not to disregard men or males in any way by speaking on the patriarchy or where we are as a whole. There are many men I know who are undertaking the conscious evolution of our planet in their own ways and who are completely in balance with aspects of themselves. I like to think of them as the evolved masculine, what a glory that is to behold. There are also women I know who are way out of balance with their masculine sides, as we all have both within.

While this plunge may have caused damage to our genetic experience of awakening. If there is a fall that happened, wouldn’t it also be a part of the perfect cosmic cycle of experience?

 

Alchemicalwedding_SOPHIA_Sun

AEON SOPHIA

Gnostic traditions refer to it as Aeon Sophia. The story of this force is a fascinating description of how life came to be on Earth and the attainment of wisdom through knowledge on our planet. Aeon Sophia translates as the wisdom goddess, she who took the plunge to become an organic, living force.

“Alien Dreaming: The Enigma of the Archons – The Gaia Mythos describes how the impact of the Aeon Sophia upon the density of atomic matter produced a massive fracture, like the shattered pattern on an ice pond. The pattern has a center where Sophia is located (identified by the Mandelbrot Set), and a spider-web extension of fracture lines that run in all directions (the frozen sea of fractal waves)..”

“In the second stage of the unfoldment described in Trimorphic Protennoia, the Aeon Sophia “descends to empower her fallen members by giving them spirit or breath.” (NHLE 1996, p. 511) Thus the tensile forms morph from semi-rigid seahorses into rounded fetal forms with tails, but the tails, it seems, keep falling off and turning into other embryos. By this bizarre process of self-repeating generation, the neonate horde of the Archons emerges.”

“Human beings are on a journey of awareness,
which has been momentarily interrupted by extraneous forces.”
Carlos Castaneda, Magical Passes

This is also referred to as Shekinah in Judaism. Inanna in Babylonian mythology. Persephone with Hades going into The Underworld. Shakti in Hinduism and many other names worldwide throughout history. The story of Mary Magdalen and Mother Mary may also be alluding to the fallen goddess, along with the quest for the Holy Grail. I believe many of the stories are metaphysically metaphorical for the attainment of enlightenment. In many ancient texts, there are metaphors for the alchemical philosopher’s stone; to transcend and become awakened to inner illumination and the many symbols that represent that.

The Nag Hammadi from Gnostic traditions says that Aeons are like massive dancing conscious light and emoting energy from the center of the galactic core in our galaxy. Who revel in the bliss, play, love and excitement of creating and watching those creations come about. What is said is the living, organic life on our planet, including the human species happened with the conscious dreaming intention of the joining of Aeon Sophia and Aeon Thelete. Creating little spores of DNA that were shot out into the arms of our galaxy through a tube like tendril. They then released filaments of DNA and potential life down the arms of the galaxy to reach outer planets and nestle in and become organic life in warm environments and planets where life could thrive.

Aeon Sophia, like a mother, was curious and wanted to know how her creations would come about. She left the galactic center, which was unprecedented by Aeons before that. In doing this she fell from the center of cosmic light into more dense matter. Her plume, like a shooting star, mixed with matter in the Orion star system, creating a race of archons who are like our demented, degenerate cosmic siblings. Or so the story goes.

The earth hosting the DNA that her and Thelete dreamt up, she then came into the earth as a living breathing force that was once a dancing light from the center of our galaxy, with the ability to dream into form from her force, to protect us as well as oversee her archontic creations. We, as the human race and living earth and earthlings are the emanations of her lucid dreaming.

This knowledge and wisdom have been forsaken and hidden from the forefront of our collective perspective. What we have been taught instead, through much propaganda and the conditioning of our culture, is a misalignment by placing power outside of Self, instead of awakening the power within. Let’s just say these misaligned forces urge humanity to give intrinsic power away, to listen without discerning what truth it; truth is known within, there are many paths and teachers to light that way.

The organic force is a power so intelligent we can’t begin to comprehend it. The patriarchy shadow has consisted of brutality and control masking as superiority, attainment and collecting of materialistic urges. This is not to negate technology and living comfortably, for I simply love it yet it’s pertinent to create a balance for our future and future generations.

Do you think we use technology as a mask to a deeply un-rooted issue of having lost our connection to our sacred planet, who is alive and teeming with universal intelligence?

This intelligence can be seen in the simplest living thing like a shell or plant, holding the Fibonacci sequence, or golden ratio.

The wool has been pulled over our eyes for many millenia. Creating fear, separation, rifts of fearing what is different steeped so deep that it has disconnected us from our own essence, nature and connection to one another. This is displayed in the shadow domination of the collective in how we treat each other, animals and our earth if we sense there is a difference or something to be feared or the cruelty and abuse that happens.

Most human beings are doing their best given their state of circumstances and environment. This is not to say there aren’t the pathos, or mutations, which occurs in all living things on our planet.

361381559_0cdd320098

ORGONE

I wrote briefly about this years ago, links are below for some meditations to connect to this ether, orgone, prana matter. This earth energy I speak of has been scientifically studied, although no surprise, suppressed. It was harnessed and observed by scientist Dr. Wilhelm Reich who coined the term Orgone. In the US, where we are supposed to have free speech, Dr. Reich’s work was confiscated and destroyed because it went in direct opposition to the pharmaceutical industry at the time. He created an Orgone accumulator that could heal disease, with the harnessing of Orgone; Earth’s own erotic energy or Aeon Sophia.

“And shortly after arriving coined the term “orgone” – from “orgasm” and “organism” – for a biological energy he said he had discovered, which he said others called God. “ -Wikipedia

“Charged with contempt in 1956 for having violated the injunction, Reich was sentenced to two years’ imprisonment, and that summer over six tons of his publications were burned by order of the court.[n 2] He died in prison of heart failure just over a year later, days before he was due to apply for parole.[15]”

The shadow side of the elite, political system, banks and corporations are pawns to their own greed, corruption and pathology with the mentality that power lies in control, censorship and greed. True power does not control, nor deceive in order to gain materially. True power loves, gives and receives, being a source of itself

On August 23, six tons of Reich’s books, journals and papers were burned in New York, in the Gansevoort incinerator, the public incinerator on 25th Street. The material included copies of several of his books, including The Sexual Revolution, Character Analysis and The Mass Psychology of Fascism.”

“It has been cited as one of the worst examples of censorship in U.S. history.[n 2] As with the accumulators, the FDA was supposed only to observe the destruction.”

Over the past few millenia our sexual natures have also been suppressed. Whether looked at as taboo, sinful or carnally objectified to the physical through porn; this suppression has stripped away the exquisite sensations of learning the presence of mind/body/spirit and the art of sacred sensuality/sexuality as one of the many pathways to enlightenment, the human body as a tool through inner alchemy.  There is a great power in this alchemical process this that seems to be purposely concealed and diluted.

Has this information and more that we may not ever know, been hidden to keep us locked into a disempowering cycle?

To shut down our potential of aligning the neo cortex with the reptilian brain or hindbrain, in doing so activating higher centers and the evolution of our DNA?

By using breath, it can open up energy pathways to what’s known as nirvana, or Turiya which rise up the energy channels. Breath is connected to Orgone and being grounded in the body with the many tools that connect one to it, allows for clarity of life to present itself and know what truth is internally by accessing the higher states of awareness.

Perhaps allow the memory of Aeon Sophia to re-surface. I urge you, don’t take my words for it, feel what is true to you.

It’s simple and doesn’t have to be convoluted to a point of breaking down logically, for this is a sensory, intuitive and intelligent living force that is a cosmic play of life as we experience it.

If one just lets it happen, the intentionality is enough to open the doors to the inner realms and taking the step will be up to each person who is willing. Using the will with intuition becomes the sacred marriage, doing with being, ultimate alchemy.

I have a book/movie idea that I am writing that ties into this. Fingers crossed.

xo,

Nicole

 

 

https://nicoleciccarelli.com/2011/12/13/intuitive-opening/

https://nicoleciccarelli.com/2012/05/24/kundalini-awakening/

https://nicoleciccarelli.com/2012/05/02/divine-feminine-christ-consciousness/

Repatterning

No one is flawless, we are not machines, we are organic, living beings with unique idiosyncracies. In flaws a perfection is found, a rhythm that connects us all.
Like the seasons, we all have our deaths and rebirths of self.

To look a pattern as a tool to learn from can leave one empowered, re-patterning is one of the most beautiful processes of transformation.

It is said that the worst will happen before a pattern shifts, weeding the constucts that have created it, a witnessing before release.
If you can’t see patterns and self-actualize, how can you shift and create what is desired?

As humans we are naturally attracted to what is comfortable, an old pattern. When they are overgrown perceptions that no longer hold true, they can be debilitating, like a trap holding us in irrelevant thoughts and feelings.

Perspective comes from emotional, mental and physical contructs of how we have perceived our reality. Our experiences create our perceptions, becoming beliefs of self and world.

We have all done things that are not always representative of what we truly want to do and be, the process of self-actualization is becoming aware of these patterns. When experiences that are not liked happen over and over, it means there is something to acknowledge.
Changing a pattern means altering behavior, thoughts and feelings to suit the vision of what is desired. This can occur by going within and seeing what is behind a pattern. Digging into the deeper thoughts and emotions within self.

Sometimes jugdement of self is greater than judgement of anything.

Blame, shame and guilt go hand in hand, from dogmatic conditioning. Through fear of failure or making a mistake, many overcompensate by finding what is wrong and blaming the outer world. In having to be right a judgement frame of reference is created, inhibiting true freedom.
Holding onto shame, blame and guilt will not lend to transformation.
Many think one perspective and way of being is better than another. This is a lack of empathy for the whole picture. Look at our world, and the many levels this is played out on, from the micro units of family, to the macro of countries and religions.
Having to be right is tied into our competitive drive for success, it can become disempowering because one is right and one is wrong, equating to a feeling of failing.

Am I right? 😉

Fear of failure boils down to not wanting to look bad by peer/work/social/family group. Looking bad means making a mistake, being wrong, not feeling accepted for one’s choices, estrangement, rejection, or the root….

Not feeling loved.

Caring what others think is a natural and biological part of being human. It’s a genetic pattern to protect us from being alone, to cooperate in group, healthy to a certain extent. When too much emphasis is placed on caring what others think, the inner world and self confidence can be squelched.
When we expect ourselves, our lives and others to meet expectations and they’re not, the result can be a myriad of negative emotions ie. disappointment, anger, sadness, fear, alienation, etc..

Take disappointment and become empowered. Shift anger into motivation. Take shame and guilt and turn it into objective observation of self.
Thought

“OK, I see this, and I wish for something different…..”
Intend it into existence.

Acceptance first has to start within.
Trust and let go of any guilt or shame that you are doing something incorrectly. For you are absolutely perfect right now, in this moment, exactly what is meant to be.

Repatterning

It takes 21 days to change a pattern.

I have seen many of my own patterns surface lately, parts of me that are not always what I like, nor desire. I view these patterns as something to learn through. Life is a choice, to be a victim to self and circumstances, or re-create the shift that is needed. Re-patterning is a part of my self-actualization.

Gathering my energies, I will sit in meditation twice a day. I feel what I wish to shift, appreciate, and surrender any negative thought and emotional pattern surrounding it.

This is a conscious monitoring of everything I think, speak and feel. With effort and patience, I hold my vision firmly, positively, and feel good about life. Not allowing myself to be distracted by what is not working, instead loving what is. Affirmations lend to this, I come up with them as I go along, usually the opposite of what I don’t want.

This is a game I am creating to see what will happen after 21 days. If you wish you can do your own re-patterning with me from home. See what comes up for you, what you wish, visualize and feel it into your life.
You can share if you’d like.

.

xo,

Nicole

Meditation = The Zone

I meditated the first time when I was 9.
Sitting on my bed, I was reading a book explaining the technique.
“Sit with your eyes closed” this book said, “Let your mind take you into a quiet place.”
I closed my eyes and was immersed into a world where I was soaring as a bird, diving into the water becoming a fish.
Coming back to reality I thought,
I liked that.
Taking the art of it up again when I was 24,there are many forms I have practiced.
Meditation has been my staple over the past few years. When I stick to it, my life dramatically reflects a positive inner state.

Examination has been my source of calmness, strength and gathering of energies. It is by going within the stillness, that I have found myself to exist on a higher level than what I perceive.
I have been able to harness my true self and create more abundantly the life I choose to lead.
Forming around the inward state of being.

Inspiration calls me deep in the throes of quietness.
It is within the nothingness that anything is created.
In the stillness where life itself takes form.
The awareness of unthinking remembers who I am.

Meditating brings about a clarity that transcends thought.
Where being is here, there, everywhere.

My everyday imagination tends to take me places far away, analyzing, dreaming and reflecting.
The point of meditation is to slow the mind down to consciously create life.
It raises consciousness by seeing through the ego filters and stories of life. A gain of comprehending thoughts, actions, words and intentions.
When meditating, I literally scan myself and the world, to acknowledge how I am affecting the web of reality.
I process and come into stillness.
The result is a grounded space of tranquility and acceptance. An understanding of what I create and who I am.
This space allows me to be conscious of self, in a way that supersedes ego.

I sit silently to hear myself clearly.

Meditation has taught me self-discipline. Discipline to gain the level of living that I wish to attain.
Self discipline in doing a daily meditation.
Eating foods that are good for my body, not just what I crave.
Staying in on a weekend to build upon what I am creating.
Not balking and running away, when things falls apart around me.
Being active, not reactive.
Discipline to keep myself in check.
Having the urge, noticing the urge, overcoming the urge.

It’s all about balance, yo.

 

Getting in the Zone

While the normal idea of meditating is sitting in silence, or chanting for hours at a time. Those are not the only form.

You may not realize when you are meditating. Meditating is being conscious in a place that becomes “the zone”.
Being in the zone is like the flow, the inward reflection of the outward living “flow”.

Think about the moments when you lose track of time, when existence stands still. You are present, yet know a place of awareness higher than this life.
Unthinking, just knowing.

That is being in the zone.

Any time you are creating, doing or being and slip into the zone or
dreaming state of awareness is meditating. When athletes speak of being in the zone it is also a form of meditating.

Other examples include:
Cleaning and organizing
Cooking
Making music
Artists creating
Exercising
Visualizations
(I will elaborate more on visualization in my post about manifesting)
Yoga
Breath-work

Meditating is about you. Taking time to YOURSELF, the space that is you and your life.
While we are lead to believe the opposite in our world, self should always come first.
Why?
If you aren’t clear, grounded and engaged, how can you immerse yourself in what you bring to life and others?

A practice to try is sitting in silence for 7 minutes every morning when you awake. With the intention of allowing thoughts to surface and dissolve into nothingness.
Eventually, a space of quiet is the result.

How do you feel when you are through?

xo,
Nicole

There are so many varieties of meditating, and finding one that suits your needs may take a bit of time. By practicing you will find your groove, if you need facilitating, you know where to contact me.

Purpose and Dream creating

Cleansing

Ooooh, am I feeling it…
Today I feel better than yesterday, yesterday felt better than Monday.
My Labor day consisted of feeling ICKY; headache, tired, lethargic and foggy-headed.

Picture the body like a house, when a house has dust and clutter, it’s not so easy to feel clean, same goes for a healthy body.
Over the spring and summer with traveling, family time and partying. I indulged and had a mind-blowing time doing so.
The weather is cooling and autumn is approaching, I am now in a mode of wanting to clear out the residue.

It’s my fall cleaning.

Cleansing is an important aspect of my spiritual philosophy, I have done many types of cleanses.
When I start a cleanse, it is quite a large undertaking, I like to look at it as though I am in a healing state.
I have also started a 40 day meditation to go along with this, incorporating 4 Kundalini yoga meditations. One for prosperity, health, empowerment, resilience & strength.
I am going to break down the beginning of my cleanse for you, this being a pre-cleanse of about 3 weeks. The more intense cleanse I will be doing afterwards and sharing with you when I do.
This is a short briefing, recipes, more information and detoxing the organs will come in separate posts.

The purpose of this pre-cleanse is to get the body in a more alkaline state with food consumption, so that the cells, systems and organs can properly release toxins without too much detox symptoms.
Meaning, it’s easier to do then some of the more intense cleanses, becoming a lifestyle.

The first thing to go was caffeine, which I had become quite dependent upon.
Headaches and irritability ensued for about 2 days, which I am ok with.
The Chlorogenic acid in black coffee can be good for the liver, and yerba mate is a great enhancer, yet, with what I am doing, the stimulant properties of caffeine detract from cleansing.

Adios caffeine, I love you, but you and I are no longer meant to be……

right now.

This may seem limited, but is actually quite easy once you get the hang of it.

No gluten
No peanuts
No vinegar (except ACV)
No dairy
No soy
No alcohol
No stimulants
No corn (except blue chips)
No sugars (including refined, fruit sugars, agave, and any other type of sweetener, Stevia is the best alternative)

When one cleanses the first few days herxheimer reaction may result, leaving one with flu-like symptoms.
Afterwards energy levels and health will start to drastically improve, leaving all parts of the body thriving.

I make sure to supplement everyday with a multi-vitamin that includes whole foods, Omega 3’s, Spirulina, Iodine, Magnesium, 5,000 mg of vitamin C, B- Complex, Iron. There are several other supplements that can be included, depending on body, blood type and what is being detoxed.

For everything stated below, organic and locally grown is preferred.

A clove of garlic or two every 3 days for medicinal properties. Great article on Garlic.

Oil Pulling and Chelation are very important to rid the body of heavy metals and toxins.

2 shots of Raw Apple Cider vinegar daily.

2 tblsns of extra virgin coconut oil daily.

Grapefruit seed extract

Probiotics

Cayenne on mostly everything

Sea salt

Cilantro

Lemon water, and lemons on veggies (alkalinizing)

info on what is stated above, also more to add to regimen

Superfoods that are not fruits

Water:
Drink as much water as possible.
I drink almost a gallon of water a day, sometimes infused with baking soda and sea salt.

Veggies and more veggies, either raw or steamed, sauteed slightly with olive oil or coconut oil and whatever else you prefer.

Seaweed (Wakame, Arame) daily

Beans and Legumes

Fermented foods are beneficial for digestion (Kim Chee, Sauerkraut etc)

Raw Almonds, Raw cashews, Raw hazelnuts.

Avocados & Coconuts have good fats to ingest

Grains:

Brown rice
Quinoa
Amaranth
Steel cut oats

Protein:
(At most once a day)
Free range eggs (more runny, lecithin in yolk is good for brain)
Free range chicken

For meals it’s best that grains are not mixed with protein, it should be either one or the other with veggies. The ratio being 1/4 grain to 3/4 veggies, same with the ratio of protein to veggies. For digestive enzymes when eating only eat until 80% full.

In the morning an apple or grapefruit can be eaten for breakfast, when eating fruit try not to consume anything 20 minutes prior to eating, or for 1 hours after eating, fruit mixed with other foods causes fermentation in the stomach.

Bentonite clay once a day

Senna Leaf tea (optional)

Exercise:
Exercise is extremely important not only when cleansing. It helps the body to rid itself of toxins, while raising endorphins, strength and stamina.
I am doing Bikram at least twice a week, on the other days walking for minimum of a mile.

That is all I can muster for today, I will feel better shortly : )

If you have any questions, or for a more personalized regimen, contact me.

xo,

Nicole

A really great book to check out is The Body Ecology Diet by Donna Gates for more thorough information.