The Fall of the Feminine

Once upon a time the God and Goddess stood together, hand in hand in love with one another and their creation in a balanced harmony.

Over time the Goddess has fallen, to her knees, weeping as she witnessed her lands and creatures wreaked by destruction. Perpetrated by bloodshed, with wars waged against her children. As she fell, she felt the pain sink deep into her heart and core, embedding itself into the genetic memory of all humans.

This became the fall of humanity’s hearts and intuitive minds. For as the feminine fell, we were thrust into harsh times. This harshness has encapsulated our race in a time capsule that censors our quest for sustenance that can be re-attuned to by going deep within.

Many hear the resonant chords in our hearts and minds of a time when the balance with the feminine was harmonious. When this suppressed information was understood, engaged with.

That which is suppressed must also be extremely powerful.

This post is not to place blame, nor focus on what has happened. It’s to uncover a deeply rooted story that has been hidden; the power of the feminine and loss of sacred knowledge and the connection to our natural cycles and rhythms. This includes the earth, all earthlings and ways of being in harmony with her and through her, the universe at large.

This is my Philosopher’s Stone if you will and a taboo subject, as the information is quite hidden, some of it destroyed. The remembering of where we come from is vitally important to me in the quest for wisdom, attainment of higher consciousness and what it represents.

Let’s just take the story I’m about to present as an allegory, or a metaphor. One that can be interpreted in many ways, yet has a similar by-product seen by the denial of our intrinsically connected nature. This fall I speak of has been one of the most suppressed pieces of information in our history. I’ve been researching different parts of it for several years. If you are interested you can do your own research as I try to keep this simple because one can definitely get sucked into a rabbit hole of it. With this plunge it’s like we’ve been cut off, like an etheric umbilical cord, from our primordial source of nature and being. Our race as a whole.

What I refer to as the patriarchial rule is not men or males, it’s the dogma, control, sublimation, domination and suppression of humans and nature through religions and corruption. The subtle and not so subtle dishonoring and shutting down the “human being” more so the feminine. This is not to disregard men or males in any way by speaking on the patriarchy or where we are as a whole. There are many men I know who are undertaking the conscious evolution of our planet in their own ways and who are completely in balance with aspects of themselves. I like to think of them as the evolved masculine, what a glory that is to behold. There are also women I know who are way out of balance with their masculine sides, as we all have both within.

While this plunge may have caused damage to our genetic experience of awakening. If there is a fall that happened, wouldn’t it also be a part of the perfect cosmic cycle of experience?

 

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AEON SOPHIA

Gnostic traditions refer to it as Aeon Sophia. The story of this force is a fascinating description of how life came to be on Earth and the attainment of wisdom through knowledge on our planet. Aeon Sophia translates as the wisdom goddess, she who took the plunge to become an organic, living force.

“Alien Dreaming: The Enigma of the Archons – The Gaia Mythos describes how the impact of the Aeon Sophia upon the density of atomic matter produced a massive fracture, like the shattered pattern on an ice pond. The pattern has a center where Sophia is located (identified by the Mandelbrot Set), and a spider-web extension of fracture lines that run in all directions (the frozen sea of fractal waves)..”

“In the second stage of the unfoldment described in Trimorphic Protennoia, the Aeon Sophia “descends to empower her fallen members by giving them spirit or breath.” (NHLE 1996, p. 511) Thus the tensile forms morph from semi-rigid seahorses into rounded fetal forms with tails, but the tails, it seems, keep falling off and turning into other embryos. By this bizarre process of self-repeating generation, the neonate horde of the Archons emerges.”

“Human beings are on a journey of awareness,
which has been momentarily interrupted by extraneous forces.”
Carlos Castaneda, Magical Passes

This is also referred to as Shekinah in Judaism. Inanna in Babylonian mythology. Persephone with Hades going into The Underworld. Shakti in Hinduism and many other names worldwide throughout history. The story of Mary Magdalen and Mother Mary may also be alluding to the fallen goddess, along with the quest for the Holy Grail. I believe many of the stories are metaphysically metaphorical for the attainment of enlightenment. In many ancient texts, there are metaphors for the alchemical philosopher’s stone; to transcend and become awakened to inner illumination and the many symbols that represent that.

The Nag Hammadi from Gnostic traditions says that Aeons are like massive dancing conscious light and emoting energy from the center of the galactic core in our galaxy. Who revel in the bliss, play, love and excitement of creating and watching those creations come about. What is said is the living, organic life on our planet, including the human species happened with the conscious dreaming intention of the joining of Aeon Sophia and Aeon Thelete. Creating little spores of DNA that were shot out into the arms of our galaxy through a tube like tendril. They then released filaments of DNA and potential life down the arms of the galaxy to reach outer planets and nestle in and become organic life in warm environments and planets where life could thrive.

Aeon Sophia, like a mother, was curious and wanted to know how her creations would come about. She left the galactic center, which was unprecedented by Aeons before that. In doing this she fell from the center of cosmic light into more dense matter. Her plume, like a shooting star, mixed with matter in the Orion star system, creating a race of archons who are like our demented, degenerate cosmic siblings. Or so the story goes.

The earth hosting the DNA that her and Thelete dreamt up, she then came into the earth as a living breathing force that was once a dancing light from the center of our galaxy, with the ability to dream into form from her force, to protect us as well as oversee her archontic creations. We, as the human race and living earth and earthlings are the emanations of her lucid dreaming.

This knowledge and wisdom have been forsaken and hidden from the forefront of our collective perspective. What we have been taught instead, through much propaganda and the conditioning of our culture, is a misalignment by placing power outside of Self, instead of awakening the power within. Let’s just say these misaligned forces urge humanity to give intrinsic power away, to listen without discerning what truth it; truth is known within, there are many paths and teachers to light that way.

The organic force is a power so intelligent we can’t begin to comprehend it. The patriarchy shadow has consisted of brutality and control masking as superiority, attainment and collecting of materialistic urges. This is not to negate technology and living comfortably, for I simply love it yet it’s pertinent to create a balance for our future and future generations.

Do you think we use technology as a mask to a deeply un-rooted issue of having lost our connection to our sacred planet, who is alive and teeming with universal intelligence?

This intelligence can be seen in the simplest living thing like a shell or plant, holding the Fibonacci sequence, or golden ratio.

The wool has been pulled over our eyes for many millenia. Creating fear, separation, rifts of fearing what is different steeped so deep that it has disconnected us from our own essence, nature and connection to one another. This is displayed in the shadow domination of the collective in how we treat each other, animals and our earth if we sense there is a difference or something to be feared or the cruelty and abuse that happens.

Most human beings are doing their best given their state of circumstances and environment. This is not to say there aren’t the pathos, or mutations, which occurs in all living things on our planet.

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ORGONE

I wrote briefly about this years ago, links are below for some meditations to connect to this ether, orgone, prana matter. This earth energy I speak of has been scientifically studied, although no surprise, suppressed. It was harnessed and observed by scientist Dr. Wilhelm Reich who coined the term Orgone. In the US, where we are supposed to have free speech, Dr. Reich’s work was confiscated and destroyed because it went in direct opposition to the pharmaceutical industry at the time. He created an Orgone accumulator that could heal disease, with the harnessing of Orgone; Earth’s own erotic energy or Aeon Sophia.

“And shortly after arriving coined the term “orgone” – from “orgasm” and “organism” – for a biological energy he said he had discovered, which he said others called God. “ -Wikipedia

“Charged with contempt in 1956 for having violated the injunction, Reich was sentenced to two years’ imprisonment, and that summer over six tons of his publications were burned by order of the court.[n 2] He died in prison of heart failure just over a year later, days before he was due to apply for parole.[15]”

The shadow side of the elite, political system, banks and corporations are pawns to their own greed, corruption and pathology with the mentality that power lies in control, censorship and greed. True power does not control, nor deceive in order to gain materially. True power loves, gives and receives, being a source of itself

On August 23, six tons of Reich’s books, journals and papers were burned in New York, in the Gansevoort incinerator, the public incinerator on 25th Street. The material included copies of several of his books, including The Sexual Revolution, Character Analysis and The Mass Psychology of Fascism.”

“It has been cited as one of the worst examples of censorship in U.S. history.[n 2] As with the accumulators, the FDA was supposed only to observe the destruction.”

Over the past few millenia our sexual natures have also been suppressed. Whether looked at as taboo, sinful or carnally objectified to the physical through porn; this suppression has stripped away the exquisite sensations of learning the presence of mind/body/spirit and the art of sacred sensuality/sexuality as one of the many pathways to enlightenment, the human body as a tool through inner alchemy.  There is a great power in this alchemical process this that seems to be purposely concealed and diluted.

Has this information and more that we may not ever know, been hidden to keep us locked into a disempowering cycle?

To shut down our potential of aligning the neo cortex with the reptilian brain or hindbrain, in doing so activating higher centers and the evolution of our DNA?

By using breath, it can open up energy pathways to what’s known as nirvana, or Turiya which rise up the energy channels. Breath is connected to Orgone and being grounded in the body with the many tools that connect one to it, allows for clarity of life to present itself and know what truth is internally by accessing the higher states of awareness.

Perhaps allow the memory of Aeon Sophia to re-surface. I urge you, don’t take my words for it, feel what is true to you.

It’s simple and doesn’t have to be convoluted to a point of breaking down logically, for this is a sensory, intuitive and intelligent living force that is a cosmic play of life as we experience it.

If one just lets it happen, the intentionality is enough to open the doors to the inner realms and taking the step will be up to each person who is willing. Using the will with intuition becomes the sacred marriage, doing with being, ultimate alchemy.

I have a book/movie idea that I am writing that ties into this. Fingers crossed.

xo,

Nicole

 

 

https://nicoleciccarelli.com/2011/12/13/intuitive-opening/

https://nicoleciccarelli.com/2012/05/24/kundalini-awakening/

https://nicoleciccarelli.com/2012/05/02/divine-feminine-christ-consciousness/

Authentically Empowered Woman

An Authentically Empowered Woman:

Knows thyself therefore can connect authentically to others and resides in her inner knowing, a knowing that propels her in motion.

Needs no validation from the outer world to draw from the reservoir of inner self and action. Knows that true beauty is exuding an inner radiance that lights the inner and outer, towards self and others. True validation starts within.

Has forged a path for herself through her own gifts, resources, diligence, resilience and patience, not needing to rely on those around her. Pulls creativity from her deep inner well spring, one that is eternally hers and unique to her experience, sharing it with others to build upon.

Has gone through the dark night of her soul, to come out complete and awakened to her light of self-awareness. She honors herself and those around her, coming from a place of pure inspiration.

Pushes forward against all odds and listens to her inner for what she knows to be, for within self the answer rings with clarity.

Knows that completeness is in the moment and holds space from that awakened sense for others to find their own essence. Gives from her empowered sense, not expecting, instead standing in what she deserves.

Speaks her truth from a place of genuinity and strength of being. Knows that being vulnerable is an expression of wisdom and in that there is a softness of connecting.

Magnetizes what she needs to learn from life and the people who support her highest state of being. Understanding the inter connectedness of life and as a beloved friend states:

“As she listens to the signs and sounds of that and those around her which inspire influence and suggest, she hears, for it is in the mirror reflection that we find the guided alignment because in all of our individual work lies the collective”

 

xo,

Nicole

Dream On

Shoot for the stars, for you may end up on Venus, heaven or maybe Mars.

Alas, falling seems to have lead me to great heights (See story below).
Leaving Chicago for California, falling and breaking my elbow. On my flight back to Michigan to be treated for it, my thoughts were I wouldn’t be traveling to LA for a while.

I struck up conversation with the person sitting next to me on this plane, who was leaving his current job. Which became a fortuitous meeting leading me to a new position as executive assistant to singer Matt Goss.

What I learned from this chance meeting, was the importance of reaching out, being kind and conversing with a neighbor. One can never know when an opportunity may come about. It’s the chance meetings that can sometimes alter the course of life. An unexpected yet meaningful coincidence of an energetic time-continuum pattern, what Carl Jung termed “Synchronistic”

Originally from London, Matt Goss is a headlining singer at Caesars Palace.

The show is quite phenomenal. His singing a conduit for the whole experience it includes a fantastic band and gorgeous singers and dancers. Not to be missed if you’re in Las Vegas.

Every day presents me with new opportunities, my catalyst being fiery ambition. I feel blessed by the absolute perfection within my path bringing me fun and patience to make my goals happen. As I continue to learn and grow I’m also allowing my wings to unfold in LA, while grounding myself into simplicity.
Blown away in the ultimate way that life works; experiences that are irrefutably meant to be,  Los Angeles beckoning me back.

A purposeful tragedy.
Falling to pick oneself up again as the universe conspires to place pieces in an order, an inescapable destiny. This is a purposeful path made through diligence and intention, seeded from the unexpected.
Matter forms itself to will and intention, belief and action.
Luck or perhaps divine intervention?

are they one and the same?
This is representative of taking chances, opening up and reaching out, for you never know what opportunity may come about.

Dream on, to dream big, lovely dreamer.
And I leave you with this to ponder

…… What is your Dream and how can you make it your Purpose?…..

xo,

Nicole

Breaking My Arm Healed My Nihilism

“You must be ready to burn yourself in your own flame;
how could you rise anew if you have not first become ashes?”

The past few months have felt like a whirlwind of excitement and opportunity, tossing me to and fro. Within the eye of the storm my center has remained. Forever I return to it. Seeking solace in what can feel like madness within matter and existence.

A nagging feeling of Nihilism was underlying my life the past couple of years. The passion and vigor that once drove me to be daring, seemed fading. I was starting to feel that my lofty ambitions were only pipe dreams. Perhaps I was silly to be dreaming so big while the reality was not at all what I had dreamt.

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Like a crescendo in a symphony, opportunity permeated my life with deep harmony. Healing to mind and spirit. Helping me to master the outer realms with introspection into the shadows and light of self. As only a great teacher does.
In a way that only true mastery of self-love occurs. This state of mind has taken ahold, possessing all the right ingredients to create a cacophony of chaotic beauty.

And completely shake me out of what I knew things to be.

What is the meaning if one doesn’t dare to dream or take chances?

Or laugh at the expense of self?

I dared again and flew to Los Angeles, on a whim and string of possibilities. To encounter new experiences and a fateful night in which I tripped over a balcony 15 feet onto the cement, breaking my elbow and having a surgery that I quickly am recovered from.

Since then an epiphany has overcome me, thus being; all the mundane complaints that could underly my thoughts are vanishing. I am filled with joy and laughter and a new manner of looking at life. In complete gratitude for being alive, let alone only having a broken elbow. As I keep reiterating to myself, this could’ve been much worse.

I have a renewed sense; an awe for the microcosm in life is resurfacing. I am seeing how much love, abundance and beauty surround me. Not in the future, not as a hope, not in my dreams, but here and now, in my living reality.

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Intention: Radiating the love I feel for life and those around me as pure gratitude from my source of living consciousness. Being lead by this heart of mine, guiding and shining through what may feel like chaos into clarity.

Triumphant over tragedy in mind, body and spirit.

As 2013 draws to an end, I savor the moments with family and friends. I am in complete awe of the universe and its manifestations.

I know that 2014 will be a year of action, gratitude and awakening. Sowing the seeds of my dreams that have already been planted, knowing my highest potential is manifesting with gratitude and action.

Any Nihilism becoming Extropianism.

“To love beauty is to see light.”- Victor Hugo

Xo,

Nicole

As with all in my life, the details will be explored more in my memoir.
I want to extend a warm thank you for all the help I’ve received from family and friends with this injury. While my independence wants me to do everything myself, there are times when help is necessary and for that I am truly grateful.

Emotional Feeling

This is a perpetuation of my absolution of feeling guilt for
feeling,
as though somehow, as far along as I am in my conscious evolution I am beyond the most basic human instinct of feeling.

Being human, there is a range of emotions that pass by, while the thoughts in my mind attach to these separate feelings, I give them more credence than they sometimes deserve. This is where meditation and the practice of acceptance and release come into play.

While I believe in the zen mentality of allowing thoughts to pass by, or the existential belief that there is no meaning, we make meaning. I think it negates the power of our emotional being, that which desires to be felt.

In our society we are conditioned to be on the more unemotional side, as though we can’t express ourselves fully without feeling accepted for what’s being felt.
Have you felt that?

I think this is even more prominent in the conditioning of boys and men. Which is saddening, because some of the most poignant experiences I’ve had with men have been them opening up their beautiful emotions in my presence.

If we were raised to believe that emotional release was healthy and helped us to be healthier, whole beings, I think we’d have a different story.

I AM HUMAN and I FEEL

There is a beauty to feeling, for love is the highest truth of our emotional beings. As simple as that sounds think of the love you have for those in your life, does it resonate a feeling or vibration much higher than anything else we cling to as real?

True health holds the highest components of emotional release, repressed emotions can block health on the physical level. Perhaps all sickness is only a result of emotions that have not been felt?
In some of the teachings I’ve come across is when we tap to a core of emotion, even to the quantum level, it is released from all aspects of our being. Therefore hiding and evading what we feel ends up hurting us, if we can touch the center of whatever a locked emotion is, it becomes liberation.

With that I end this and tell you…

Feel what you feel it’s beautiful to feel, acknowledge it, let it be, for then it becomes a passage of knowing, strengthening you in your own self-growth.

xo,

Nicole

Fluid to Make Waves

 

And the water was where I was standing, in a river where two diverging paths became one. Bubbling and flowing around me, I let go of everything I was holding onto into this healing place and a peace enfolded me.
I was reminded that many paths lead to the source, whatever that Source may be, separate paths converge to diverge again, naturally.
After being so much like air and earth lately, I am reminded to become more fluid again like this powerful flowing river.

I fill myself with the essence of what is the surrounding environment. The trees and plants nourished by the water that flows fluidly, moving over the rocks and earth that become eroded by continual movement. The wood, trees and plants providing home and food for the animals and insects to survive upon. My totem hawk flying above representing my free spirit, in the air that gives breath to life, with the fiery Sun beaming down.

All elements are needed to sustain an ecosystem. As a small piece of the whole, becoming one with the environment, whatever it may be, brings clarity and purity.

As I’m meditating in the tranquility, I remember that becoming like water means letting go of attachment to desires, wants, needs, possibilities and outcomes to allow the flow to lead me where I’m meant to go. Flowing around obstacles fluidly creates peace of mind. Rather than resisting or turning away, which feeds energy to what’s not working, I choose to see life for how it exists right now.

Going through my Saturn return over the past year and a half have been what I would call a shift in the way I perceive my outer world. Rather than “trying” , which is a futile term, to manifest all of my separate visions and dreams into existence, I am learning to create by simply being.
My inner world has been fortified with truth, which becomes fluid as I evolve more fully into the potential that exists. I realize with new inward learning that it’s not about my belief in my dreams and goals or the outer reality, it’s my belief in myself.

I fully believe in me.

A deep truth, overlaid by the deeper truth derived from all the inner work I’ve done over the years. One that is unshakeable in its very core.

That truth is

I accept and love what is, life, living, being…….

Like the many states of water, I may continually shift, evolve and change, yet, my essence will always remain the same. Understood by the outer world or not. No thing, no one, no experience will ever shake it, it’s found outside all ego attachment and identity defined through outer means. It is a presence within that is continually unfolding like a lotus blossoming. As this never-ending flower of self unfurls gorgeous petals, I reinforce my truth …

I love my life, it’s perfect right now and continually blows my mind with organic beauty that is a flow. Exploring this creation I have…. being, here, now, continuously with gratitude for living. The same source of consciousness that resides in me resides in everything.

xo,

Nicole

Related Articles:

Bone Deep Weary (onlyhereonlynow.com)
The Flow, yo
Animus Totem
Are we adding some much-needed sanity to the world? (beyondmeds.com)
Creative Mind (dranilj1.wordpress.com)
Judge Not Others (livinginthenow.net)

The Judge

I sit here, thinking and contemplating, allowing my mind to wander and analyze as it can tend to, and I think to myself…

How much

I think….

I then take a moment, becoming the observer to my thoughts allowing the superconsciousness to come through, remembering to
let go of thinking so much.

It has no meaning if it creates an analysis paralysis. This is where our beautiful brains create barriers from truly witnessing our experience in the moment from a place of acceptance. A filter placed around reality by this thing called our ego and conditioning, which is judgement for self and others.

These judgements are our conditioning. Functions formed from birth onwards as we learn ways to comprehend and be in our world that is already set up by structures in place. Created by the brains of our ancestors dating back through our genetic encoding.

Perception is based around these judgements, which are categorizations, labels, materials, senses, schools of thought, religions, races, creeds, ideas and much else. All compartments of the brain’s ability to filter through our perception and show us what has already been preconditioned by our subconscious. We are all receiving different feedbacks from our brain and conditions already in place. Which lets us understand the small faculty of what is really going in our sensory experience.

There is so much that our brain is constantly taking in, we only receive a small percentage of it consciously, that which we already have set up as belief structures.

While this serves us, it is also quite a detriment as our inner judge. This judge of our mind tells us what is good/bad right/wrong, proper/improper, acceptable/not acceptable by our standards and those of the society we are a part of.

Our judgements will vary, and are changing as we do, also being negatively or positively tipped

one person could state

those leaves are beautiful

another might say about the same leaves

look at how they’re dying

Glass half empty or full, neither is right or wrong, it’s judging based on conditioning and perception.

This is where discernment takes place, what feels right?

Someone tells you something that they’ve experienced, do you take their word or find out for yourself?

Is something done because it is status quo?

Status quo is constantly changing. What I thought I’ve known has drastically changed through time.
Evolution, correct?

Conscious REvolution

It’s easy to think that we know others and our world fully. We don’t, we can’t possibly with the small percentage that our neurological function allows us to experience from our limited perception. What our impression of others and our world are, is not all it is, only what and who they are to us in our perception of here and now.

Thus can sometimes the challenge of humanity, the misunderstanding and lack of empathy.

 

We are all connected to the superconsciousness*, like the huge brain connecting all of our little brains together. In individuality lies our similarity to being human. Let your imagination come into play. The part of brain that lets the mind wander into fanciful dreamland and artistic endeavors, bringing ideas and concepts through from faculties that are not always what are perceived physically.

xo,

Nicole

related interesting articles:

The Brain, it makes you think

*Superconscious mind

We do not see with our eyes we see with our brains

are you living in a computer simulation?

Can we have a little humor

My Underworld

A cycle has completed, its finality brings with it complexity and understanding of my dark and light nature. The illustrious owl perched at my side, illuminating shadows to see more clearly.

This time period was a lifetime of its own.

On New Year’s 2007,the Owl appeared, with his yellow, penetrating eyes, beckoning me to view the inner depths I was seeking.
“Be Careful” were his wise words to me as I plunged into the depths of my deep and murky underworld.

Nothing could hide from his intense stare as we traveled the river Styx in search of all the ghosts and demons that were lurking.

This world was fraught with seduction and temptation. A place where phantasmorphic figures rose as distorted illusions that seemed oh, so, real. I would gaze around this illusory world to phantoms represented by societal perceptions as well as my own ideas, ones I held as superficial truths of who and what I was.

No longer

My truths became highlighted as inner workings of subconscious patterns were revealed. Deeply imbedded cycles within me, family and society came to my waking mind. Bringing the information back to the conscious surface, I would then be strengthened with the knowledge of what I had accrued.

“Trust Yourself”

This thought was my anchor, even when I couldn’t fathom understanding it.

Many experiences over these years were bright, light and love-filled, giving me a point of reference to base my truth upon. Receiving glimpses of an enlightened state, I would come back to the reality of patterns instilled within me and humanity. Disheartening and downright suffocating at times, haunting and deliberating moments of facing shadows of myself and others.
Occurrences and people were a mirror to shadows of mine, realized over the past 6 years. My subconscious would attract what I needed to see to be freed of my inner limitations and illusions. Coming up for a breath, I would have complete epiphanies, my world would shift around them to witness the glory of an awareness far beyond my consciousness.
Witnessing the beauty of who I was uncovering; the real me.

The depths while murky held rapture within themselves, a shroud that when the light shone in became illuminated strength.

Giving gratitude the whole time as I knew that when experiencing pain it was my epoch of strengthening.

The owl made its presence known again 3 years later, while I was immersed in a world of soul seeking and a vision quest. It’s wing almost brushing my cheek, I thanked it for showing its presence so visibly. Just when I thought I was complete with this underworld, after a lapse of time I heard the owl whisper in my ear.

“Go Deeper”

Through the years I dove farther into the swampy muck of personal and collective patterns. My purpose to cut free karma from myself and the underbelly of our reality, that which no longer serves me and those surrounding me.
Being sucked into the depths, like a puzzle, I began to make sense of the patterns displayed.

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Morphing and shifting, these ghosts of patterns would show up around different turns. Tempting me with their ideas, sucking me into their spheres, giving access to what they deemed important. With the power of who I was, it was my choice to feed them or watch as they vanished from my existence with the upsurge of inner realizations.
My scythe was love, acceptance and surrendering. I would cut them free and remind myself, with the owl perched on my shoulder…..

“Remember who you are, that is your unshakeable force. No matter who or what any person says, you are you and that space will never be forsaken. For that is your individual essence in this multifarious existence”

It was only an illusion.
That is not real,

To me.

As though they never were in the first place, these ghosts of disillusionments caused by conditioning to deep extents would all but vanish from my perception. Like phantoms of the past they became nothing more than distant memories.

Overwhelming at times, with the seductions and temptation of focusing on ideas, emotions, experiences, thoughts and conditions that I knew deep down were not my highest truth.

Ultimately; The illusions of Ego.

The presence of the owl has made itself known again, this time letting me know this cycle is through. Surfacing, I have an understanding of who I am.
My underworld traversed, ghosts released with intentions and motives that mirrored these old parts of me witnessed to their extinction.
I have come out of the other side of Hades, awakened and aware, knowing and clear.

The realization of the illusion has penetrated my waking mind. In that there is a part of me laughing, this game of life has become quite easy.
I know that only empowerment, positivity and love will come from this, with strength, knowing and trust in myself. The ways in which I gave my inner power away into illusions are now in place of inner empowerment, feeding me and those around me with the goodness of life.

For it was my choice what I fed all along.

 

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Joy Freeman

I understand this as part of my Kundalini’s journey.
A process aligning my subconscious, conscious and superconscious.
My filters and experience reconditioned to bring me insight into myself and others. And that to me, is the most enlightened I can become; right now.

All is of my choosing and I take full responsibility for what I think, do, speak and experience. I am no longer victim, martyr, scapegoat or any of the other roles I may have created from these murky patterns that have been freed.

I am at a clear slate, where any and everything can be created. It is up to me what I feed, love and focus on, give to and create.
With consciousness comes the great responsibility to BE, as we were all created to BE.

Over time aware of the awareness behind thinking, the all-pervasive existence that just is.

Questioning from this place when thinking,

Are you fear or love based and do you serve my highest?

This is where questioning the ego comes full circle.

Is it ego questioning ego?

Or is there a higher intelligent consciousness in place?

Yes, the dark will fall, and in its place is illuminated grace.

Whoever said it was a quick process to become awakened to our inner enlightenment?

xo ,

Nicole

Of course, the detailed experiences will be lit up in my book….. 😉

Kundalini Awakening 2

Kundalini Awakening

“Kundalini is the evolutionary mechanism in man. It is slowly but inexorably leading mankind towards a higher state of consciousness…Kundalini performs no less important a function, not only for the individual but for the whole of the race…It is at work every moment of our lives in building the brain and the nervous system, and it is therefore most necessary for the safety of mankind that some people deeply interested in it arouse this power so that the world might benefit by their experience.”

Kundalini is a life-force of its own intelligence and design. When it becomes awakened it comes with it a great, overwhelming power that clears and re-patterns many systems, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. It is the internal force in the body to heal itself.

I truly believe that when awakened it naturally starts to re-pattern the DNA. Like Kali, this energy seeks and destroys all that is not in the highest divine alignment of the individual who is awakening. Kundalini allows one to wake up to higher consciousness and potential. It imparts within the ability to look above and beyond, at times superseding duality in our 3d reality.

A radiant, powerful, light-filled energy that is red/orangey/pinkish. When awakened this energy rises up through the channels also known as nadis or meridians, into all the chakras and finally the hypothalamus. Over time filling the entire body with its energy. This awakens and lights up the pineal and pituitary glands while also starting to rewire the whole nervous system.

Kundalini energy sits at the base of the spine like a coiled cobra. It is an inexhaustible life force that has been spoken about in texts from the inception of written word, far beyond any one religion or spiritual practice. Carl Jung and many others have addressed it, referring to it as the superconsciousness.

“The researcher, philosopher-scientist Gopi Krishna, proposes the existence of a region in the human brain, a faculty of supersensory perception normally dormant, which can be awakened to activity by certain practices. Quantum physics has confirmed that the mind of the observer influences what can be observed (see “The Reality Tests,” Seed Magazine, June 4, 2008).

It is the next process within humanity’s evolution.
The energy is said to come from the same energy as our reproductive systems, and when worked properly with another it can build the Kundalini. When working on awakening (enlightenment) it is said to happen through abstaining from sexual contact with another, at first for building it within oneself. This is due to energy rising upward for evolution, downward for reproduction.

“The process of evolution is a continuous one. One cannot say positively at what height man will arrive ultimately, but the next higher stage after human consciousness is a state of higher awareness so extraordinary and blissful that the recipient of this grace is lost in wonder when he or she attains to it. What do you call that consciousness? We can call it superconsciousness, the Turiya state, Nirvana, or even a divine consciousness.”

“Both genius and illumination are the outcome of the activity of Kundalini. When this mighty force enters the conscious centre the individual is then not only illumined but also possesses genius.”

“All spring from the evolutionary impulse in the human body…The goal of all religions is certainly one, and that is to have a higher state of consciousness”

“Great ideas come through individuals, and they can change the world. But an individual is also the product of a group. We lack in great prophets in this age because the society is allotting the place of honour to material progress.”

“The condition of society is the greatest impetus in the production of religious (Kundalini) geniuses. The present world lacks in something that is favourable to the growth of individuals of vision.”

Awakened individuals are like sparks in the collective consciouness, spurring awakening in others. As we are moving into higher brain cognition as a race, we integrate our neo-mammalian brain structure with the awakening of our hypothalamus.
As we all awaken more, it will create a structure for us to move beyond mammalian tendencies. Thus it will raise the consciousness of the lower brain functions to more wholly serve our earth and race.

The energy, when worked upward, is completely mind-blowing. There are many ways to facilitate it. My journey consisted of a 6 year process from recognizing it, to full awakening, to the repatterning of my nervous system. Which has not been the smoothest process.

I could feel my Kundalini the first time when I was 23. Ignoring it for a few of years, I felt it awaken subtly in New Mexico. This consisted of my shadowy patterns surfacing and my lower back was constantly in pain.

From there I resided for a bit in the powerful lands of Hawaii, of the smoldering and alchemical volcanos, metaphorical for the process I was in. I underwent a semi-awakening, that stopped at my throat. Then, a couple of weeks later my Kundalini became fully awakened. This rising happened while I was driving around the big island.

I was consciously breathing deeply when everything went white. Blinded, I had to pull over. My limbs were completely numb with an intense buzzing feeling. I felt the flow travel up into my head, like a circuit as though it went up and out of me.

There was a lapse in time of 20-30 minutes while the powerful and intense energy worked through me. It was blissful, yet overwhelming, like an electrical current running through me. My mind was in an intense hyper-conscious mode, which included incidences with a friend afterwards where all the electricity went out talking about the experience, twice.

It takes a couple of months up to 12 years for a Kundalini awakening to come to full fruition. I still go through rewiring from time to time it comes in waves. My experience with it is not one of a completely disciplined spiritual/monastic life, as what is suggested. At times it has caused mishap when I go too far out of balance.

The purity of everything lends itself to me, I’ve noticed that which is not of my purest source falls away from my life. As it works through me, the intelligence of it wants to experience the life I lead. Through my range of emotions, while building enjoyment, enlightenment, happiness, while creatively expressing through me with music, writing, dance and interaction. A balanced existence of the feminine force of physical with the masculine non-physical.

The ultimate alchemy.

It’s now easier for me to bring the energy up on command and go into the place of whiteness (samadhi), which feels like orgasmic bliss throughout my whole being when I reach it.

I could go on this topic post after post, but instead I’ll let you be guided to your own process and research within it. Below is a breathing practice for you if you’d like, as well as articles I highly suggest.

How is your Kundalini?

xo,

Nicole

Kundalini Breathing

I will give you the breathing exercise, one of the many out there that works for me to get in touch with Kundalini
It consists of visualizing on a deep inhale in your abdomen filling up with light. Either white or the pinkish orange I addressed. On every inhale picture the energy filling with light and on the exhale visualize it starting to rise in two channels like a double helix or figure 8’s through every chakra. Do it slowly as you visualize the energy rising up into your hypothalamus where the energy pours into your Pineal gland. It then pushes upward out of your Crown Chakra Pouring back down the “front channels” up and down the legs and then back again into the “coiled snake”. You can practice this continuously and is a great way to get in touch with your Kundalini.
Hatha Yoga is a gradual way to build it, while Kundalini Yoga builds it much quicker.
The articles below I highly suggest reading if you are interested in more information.

UPDATE as of 2016:

I have found it tremendously difficult releasing some internal blocks and I was recreating unhealthy patterns, which is obviously a part of awakening. Especially in a society that does not promote the type of cultivation and encouragement needed for Kundalini’s awakening process. It has been a challenge at times remembering the power of it and to move beyond what my ego wants into remembering my soul purpose and path. I found instead trying to numb the intensity to fit into a mold that isn’t authentically me, in a world of status quo. Of course, time always allows the energy to transcend any blocks mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and even I think genetically. Like I said, it hasn’t been the smoothest process, yet I feel so much more aligned with who I am; shadows and light, so as to bring my awareness to its highest state to unlock hidden potential, within myself and others.

 

I gave part 1 of this article in the last post, which is where quotes above were taken from:

ELUCIDATION OF THE GLOBAL HUMAN EVOLUTION OF CONSCIOUSNESS BY GOPI KRISHNA (PT 2 OF 2)

http://yachnayoga.wordpress.com/2012/05/15/824/

Kundalini Awakening Symptoms

Info on Chakras:

Raging Chakras

More Breathing exercises:

Pranayama

Empathic Repatterning

Re-Patterning takes the form of releasing the shadows of self, so that the light can shine through. Opening up a can of caterpillars so that they can transform into butterflies. I believe this is one of the greatest dis-ease antidotes, as the physical body is the last place illness manifests. Studies show that re-patterning can actually shift DNA. I wish to share a snippet of my process through it with you.
While I try to refrain from labeling, for I am much more than any label, I call myself an empath, for you to gain more understanding of what I am explaining.

My body always lets me know everything that is going on, it never lies to me and I trust it explicitly. My body lets me know through intuitive feelings what is best for me, these feelings also let me know when things are positive or negative for the future or beyond. I know from my experience that my thoughts have their own frequency and resonate at different levels. Being empathic, I am able to feel exactly where my body holds every thought and feeling. The positive ones feel light and expansive, the negative ones feel like pin pricks or bullets. I don’t always understand all my empathic responses, I only know when they are released I feel amazing. When I have worked through a pattern, there is a clear feeling in my heart, stomach, back, neck or wherever I was having empathic residue.
Many of the feelings in my body are not necessarily mine, as an Empath, I take on for others what they wish to heal and sometimes cannot do themselves. Also called a lightworker, I take other’s hurt, fear, anger, insecurity, agony on to be transmuted. Without the proper release these wounds (Ment. Phys. Emot. Spir.) of others sometimes become lodged patterns within me.

My re-patterning process entails sitting in meditation. I then focus on any negative thoughts or feelings in my body and listen closely. Then something will surface, almost as though a whisper. Instead of shrugging off what I hear, which my ego wants to do, I let it come up and be heard. I will receive a memory or flash of understanding tied to a feeling and pattern of energy. Sometimes when the feeling is mine, it’s a limiting thought pattern, a belief I had held onto about myself or the world, such as “I don’t know how” or ” I don’t care”. While my conscious mind does not believe what is presented, my subconscious mind may be manifesting situations based upon these old belief patterns. After acknowledging and feeling these patterns of mine and sometimes others, I then accept, embrace and surrender them to the moment. Like little bubbles, these patterns expand and pop into the quantum field of awareness. When it is someone else’s energy lodged within me, I’ll usually get a glimpse of that person, hear their voice, or feel their presence as I release their energy. There have been times, before I knew that I was an empath that I would get very sick and not know how to release the energy. Knowledge of energetic frequencies and my own personal boundaries has allowed me to stay grounded and learn how to process for the benefit of me and the person I’m healing

I then go within and re-pattern with a belief I hold true for myself, or send love and light to it, if it is for someone else. This process includes monitoring of my thoughts and emotions, to constantly reinstate an evolving belief system.

 

After re-patterning I am in a place of higher consciousness, with awareness of the interconnectedness of everything. It’s in this place that my ego dissolves and I remember all the triviality that can seem important DOES NOT MATTER.
Stillness, silence, reflection;
Space and time slip away into a place of non-duality, where positive and negative become non-existent.
Everything just is.
Awareness behind awareness, I am a little speck glimpsing it.

All that exists is knowing, a knowing far beyond me, yet a part of me. A place of infinite love and intelligence, which is where I find my Divinity.

Attaining a broader perspective within this consciousness is what drives me to be. It takes for me to remember and bring this awareness into every aspect of my life, I aim to see it reflected in every part of every moment.
The glimpse of it can almost always be seen.

There are many ways to attain this state, every religion, philosophical and spiritual discipline have their forms, the techniques may be different, yet the place of existence remains the same. In the many attempts to gain higher consciousness the one truth is, only within is where it is found.

I am who I am constantly creating myself to be.

xo,

Nicole

Repatterning

For more about being empathic, especially if you may be an Indigo/Crystal or Starchild (you know who you are), here are more posts about this:

Vibing with an Empath
Intuitive Opening

DNA and Epigenetics